Image via Tinder

Image via Tinder

Yes, it’s now an activity and adjective. We do it on the couch, before going to bed, at dinner and even during class. 

I mean it’s so easy, just look at a photo, judging them of course, read the bio and then swipe left or right. It’s so simple and you can swipe so many people in small amount of time, and it's even easier if you have had a few drinks.  

But as we are Tindering we all have thoughts, from the photos to the activities. 

Here are a few of them:

  1. Who does this profile belong to? Which one are you?
  2. Not another group shot. 
  3. I can’t tell who is who. Dammit, I’m moving on. Left for you. 
  4. I haven’t swiped left for a bit. Probably should do that. 
  5. Why do you not have a bio? I want to know more.
  6. Why is your bio generic quotes? That tells me nothing about you. 
  7. Now that’s a good bio, great interests. You seem like an interesting person.
  8. How can you look so different in ALL of your photos?
  9. Who has only 2 pictures?
  10. OMG that’s such a cute dog. 
  11. Oh great more group shots.
  12. (Swipe left,left, left, left, left) Dammit I meant to swipe right on the last one.
  13. Don’t put “If you want to know more just message me in your bio,” we both gotta swipe right for me to ask more. 
  14. Aw of course, more generic quotes. 
  15. Haven’t swiped right in a while. Probably should swipe right.
  16. Oh, now I haven’t read that quote before. 
  17. I hate this, the picture quality is so bad and blurry. #photographerproblems 
  18. Again, who are you in all these photos? 
  19. Come on, add a bio.
  20. Omg I got a match!! 
  21. Why am I not getting a match?
  22. Am I too picky?
  23. Am I not attractive?
  24. I feel really shallow with this app. 
  25. Ugh, this is why I am not on any online dating sites.
  26. What if I meet my wife on Tinder? Then my Mom would be all, “I told you to try online dating.” 
  27. I could just delete the app. No one would know. 
  28. What do I say?
  29. Why do males have to start the conversation. We both are human, we both can communicate. 
  30. (Swiped Right) Awwwww, guess she didn’t swipe right for me, dammit. She was cute.
  31. Not another bot. They never end. 
  32. I’m done with Tinder.

We all come back two hours later.

AuthorNoah Smith